kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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