honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
