Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
