Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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