the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
