Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
it glows. i had to have it.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
