Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
there was a trapeze. enough said
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
My penis needs a shock collar
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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