I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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