If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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