i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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