Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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