my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm bleeding and have questions
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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