video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize
