Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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