Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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