I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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