When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
