My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
3 2 1 whiskey
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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