I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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