This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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