so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
