She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
