so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
