Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
