Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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