if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
