Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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