Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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