and you said cock pushups were impossible
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
