hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It's shark week go big or go home
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
