Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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