How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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