oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Just invented taco cereal.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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