At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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