called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
