The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I skipped work to stalk him.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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