why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
You were trust falling into bushes
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
