After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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