What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
