quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize