im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
