Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
