Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
