so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Someone stole a lamp last night.
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