Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
