he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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