I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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