ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize