Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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