Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
