I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
